After a series of intense negotiations, I have agreed to be a featured writer at a new website, Secret Laboratory
(I'm not sure of the exact details of the agreement. I asked my agent how much money was in it for me he and he just replied that my days of murdering the prostitutes was over)
My first article is about the Scourge of Assault Knives on our society.
I could re-post it here, per the agreements made in my contract, and I probably will later, but I figured I'd be charitable and let Secret Laboratory have exclusive first week rights.
Also, if you click over to my article here, you will be able to see a real-life photo of me.
And I just know how the ladies out there love that.