Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Master of the Universe

Strip Club Stumble Drunk.
Professional type, dressed casual.
Khakis, sweater, loafers.
Master of his domain on a stroll.
Bangs on the bell, our fates are sealed.
Rooms are 89.
Too much.
79.
Too much.
Now 10 dollars is worth debate.
2 drinks, half a lap dance.
But I can't/won't provide what they can.
Says 50, he can get it online.
I invite him to try.
For 30 minutes he plays on his phone.
He is the Master for a reason.
Finally comes back, "what can you do for me?"
77
Fine.
He takes his keys and finds the elevators.
The Master wins again.

19 comments:

  1. So he got a 89 room for just 77 bucks? SWEET BARGAINING THERE

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  2. three cheers for the master bargainer!

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  3. OMG...where did you meet my neighbor??

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  4. as a former cashier I hate that guy

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  5. I'm not even really the master of my own universe, let alone yours. Sadly.

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  6. Haggling is dead in this country, so says Costanza.

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  7. If anyone could bargain this well with a stripper/escort they definitely can sell ice to eskimo or used lipstick on ebay :)

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  8. I can appreciate haggling, but I hate when people haggle at the dumbest places. Like the inept Asian woman in the supermarket last week who was haggling with the cashier. Try explaining to a thrifty Asian woman that you don't control the prices. Hint: it doesn't work.

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  9. I need those powers when I go to the flea market.

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  10. Very nice! Well writen and all! It flows very well! I like it!

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  11. i once haggled with a stripper for a dance in exchange for a boots gift voucher. she took up the offer. in the end she wasn't worth it. i felt cheap and she got some lipstick and bottle of pepsi.

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  12. This isn't convincing me to get one of these girls any time soon. :P

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  13. Sometimes, the internet is not the cheapest place. Hope the complimentary breakfast didn't get cut out...

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