Wake up on the couch just before 11am after work.
The frozen screen door sounds like it'll shatter as it shuts.
Can't tell if I'm inhaling smoke or air, but it doesn't matter
I'm getting a head rush anyway.
Step in and grab a garbage back of rock salt
I stole from work.
A few handfuls, but it'll be enough.
A handful a day will be enough to melt it.
Maybe by April.
Idiot Neighbor steps out, spilling out of his plaid pajamas.
I step in, all bundled and wait.
Why do I care what Idiot Neighbor thinks anyway?
It's just his presence.
Step back out and spread the salt.
Step in, undress, see the financial shows.
Blue shirts with white collars, suspenders.
Bet they never had to worry about an Idiot Neighbor
and stealing rock salt for frozen walk ways.
Or maybe they did, way back when.
Which is even worse.
I wash my hands and change the channel.